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Feeling much better today where my chest is concerned. Though I still woke up feeling like I was run over by a mac truck, it was totally unrelated to my bronchitis.



I figured that I'm finally getting over being sick for the past 2 days that I would enjoy a day of happiness.



BAM! Mother Nature kicked in. It was my monthly "hahahahaha you can't get pregnant so Imma make your life living hell for 3 days" surprise. -_-



So I spent the good part of my day in the bed crying in pain. Didn't help that I had a migraine from hell. Good news! I stopped coughing.



This afternoon I was feeling slightly hungry and remembered the fresh cucumbers the neighbor brought over. Sean's mom was going to throw them out since neither of them would eat them, but I told her I'd happily eat them. I went downstairs to cut those up and toss them in some raspberry vinaigrette. I open the door to the kitchen and I see his mom sitting there with some other lady. She was like "This is my friend and she is a mental health worker. She wants to chat with you."



O.O



If there is one thing I hate more then mental health medications, it's fucking counselors. I spent a good portion of my teenage years seeing those people every day. Now you tell the pmsing female who is in immense pain because of her endometriosis that some mental health worker wants to chat with her? I had a knife in my hand chopping my cucumber up while chatting with her.



I think the woman got the idea that I didn't want to talk.



Now I'm waiting on Sean to get home from work so I can curl up in the bed with him and have him make dinner. If he doesn't make anything we are totally reheating the soup I made yesterday. I'm lazy and in pain XD

So last night I got to go to the hospital.



I've been sick for about 2 weeks now and last night it got to the point where it was hard to breathe.



I pretty much told Sean that I wasn't getting better and I needed to see a doctor.



The registration lady was really nice, she said that when I get on state healthcare, that the visit would be covered.



They checked me out, did a chest x-ray, and told me I have bronchitis and most likely asthma.



I knew I had bronchitis. I'm pretty sure I caught it from Sean's sister. But asthma? O.O



Sean said my face was exactly like that when they said that to me. It caught me totally off guard since I am a non-smoker and tend to take decent care of myself.



Oh well, guess I get to deal with it? lol

Some pictures of Sean and I.



Some were taken back in May, the ones outside were taken last week.

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Vampirewitch39
14:19 Aug 21 2010

Wine or not- you still look great. And happy. :)

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Woke up today with my head feeling less stuffy and able to breathe easier.



Still have a cough, but it's no where as bad as it was. Got my voice back for the most part.



What I did yesterday must have helped. I drank broth and pretty much vegged out on the bed all day with Sean's laptop.



In all honesty, I use his laptop more then my own crappy computer now. It's just so much nicer :(



Well except when I'm writing here and playing in photoshop. xD His computer doesn't have it installed and it's easier for me to type on my keyboard then on his laptop.



Today is payday for him, so when he gets home from work he is taking me out to dinner and then to Wal Mart. Oh fun?



I'd much rather go to Wal Mart then stay here though. Forecast to have 7 children here tonight for dinner. I hope they are bringing food because I ain't cooking tonight. I'm taking the night off. lol



I got my profile finished for the most part yesterday. I may change a few of the system graphics, but for the most part it is done. For those that are curious, the song is "Hello Fascination" by Breathe Carolina.



First day in a week or so that drinking Mt Dew didn't make me gag. I think I'm getting better for the most part.



The other day was the worse day I had in a while. I was cranky and I ranted to him in the car about his sister coming up from Texas knowing she had bronchitis. The worst part? She is a nurse. -.-



He told me I would have made a sailor blush with the language I was using. :D

New header and background. I'll do the rest of the profile tomorrow.



I am happily armed with cough syrup and ricola.



Fuck, the ricola and halls were the same price.



Yay for more natural stuff xD

Meh.



Woke up Friday morning with a slight cold.



Over the weekend I'm pretty sure it has settled in my chest and is here for a long vacation.



Last night Sean got sick of me hacking up a lung so he rubbed vicks on me. I'm glad he did, I slept a lot better.



Then I woke up and realized it was 45 degrees outside in August.



No fucking wonder I'm sick. My body is NOT used to that.



I'm miserable and smell like an old person now :(



I have to wait for Friday for some meds. I'm hoping it doesn't turn into the B-word again.

Well today was both fun and disappointing.



I got to drive about 100 miles. Mainly on the highway and with kids in the backseat. That was annoying -.-



But the bad news hit me.



My mother wanted me to come down to Florida the start of October since it will be my little brothers 18th birthday and my step-fathers 50th birthday in the same weekend. My step-grandmother is flying down from New York for that weekend and my mom figured we could do the holidays early this year and spend time together as a family.



I have been planning this for the past month and talking it over with Sean. Tonight he goes to ask his parents if we can borrow one of the better cars to make the drive down in October. They said they don't think the cars would make it that far.



We don't have the money to throw around for plane tickets and a car rental to do this, so I have to tell my family I can't make it.



Honestly, I don't know when I will get to see them next and that makes me hurt inside. I didn't get to see my brother before I left. And he is going to be moving up to New York soon. I won't get to see him before that happens. Knowing that much really hurts me.



What hurts more is the fact it seems as if me seeing my family isn't a big deal to anyone. It's like "here, we have a huge family come be family with us".



I'm just frustrated about this. Hopefully I will be able to make it there somehow. But right now, looks like it won't happen.

First few hours with ZERO children in the house in about a week and half.



I straightened my hair for tonight's party and will be doing my make up in a bit. Have some Bach playing and resonating through the entire upstairs.



Did I mention the wine? XD



I will be pleasant tonight to deal with while his family bickers over drama stuff that I don't care about.



God I feel like an old lady. A nice glass of red wine and classical music playing. heh

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Vampirewitch39
00:41 Aug 11 2010

lol Just thinking of you as a old lady makes me happy. ;)

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Some people are going to be so confused by my kismet today. I put that there after this morning's events.



Sean and I go to bed at about the same time and we wake up the same time. We even did this when we were miles apart. It is just something we do.



Well getting up at 6 am is something I do not like, but I do it because if I don't follow behind him in the morning, he will forget something.



Or take a lunch with nothing but a candy bar and Mt Dew.



So this morning I made him a lunch to take. Ham sandwich, bag of grapes, and a nutty buddy bar. Not the healthiest lunch in the world, but better then what he was going to take.



But it hit me as to how much like a housewife I was turning into. My first action the moment I got downstairs was grabbing a cup of coffee. Then I made toast up for us to eat. I had mine with peanut butter, he had his with butter and jelly. I also ate a banana.



I think the best part was when I was following him out to make sure he had everything and this is what I said. 'I love you hunny, have a great day at work. Don't forget, you have to go to your sisters after work for family pictures, I'll meet you there.'



I sounded like a housewife ._.



In other news, I do have a white shirt for the pictures tonight. Lucky for me, Sean buys shirts that are like 3 sizes too big for him. So he had a shirt that fits me. :D



Last night I also told him that I am really homesick and he started to cry and say how selfish he is because I moved up here to be with him. I ended up explaining to him that he wasn't selfish and that I wanted to move, it's just hard on me.



Today should be a decent day. Might end up playing with the boys again for a bit, then will get a shower and make up on for tonight. There is just no way in hell I'm getting pictures done and NOT have make up on with how bad my face is lately.

I don't want to seem like I am whining...But I have to post this somewhere.



Tomorrow I am requested to join his family in family portraits. Ok cool. I figured I could wear my long white skirt and a pink top that I have.



Nope. I was told jeans and a white t-shirt. I don't own a white shirt. I don't own a white bra. I can't just go out and BUY a white bra. Stores don't carry my size. I have to order them online. They don't seem to get that.



Honestly, I understand they are trying to integrate me into their huge family. I get that. I really do.



But right now, I just want to hug my own family. I want to be able to go to my mom and have her hold me while I'm depressed and see my little brother. I want to have that little hellion punch me in the arm like he does. Or make fun of me for being fat. Something. I want my small family back. I miss the smell of my moms perfume. I miss the smell of the stuff my brother uses. I miss my fucking family.



I know his family means well. It's just hard for me. This past week I have been so depressed. I've cried almost every day. Part of me wants to go back, part of me wants to stay. This is really hard.

Hmm Where to start.



Well, thanks to an awesome person, I don't have to worry about reupping my PM for a while. (♥) Helped me out a lot doing that. I was going to have to put that off for a couple of weeks while money starts to flow again.



This morning I went grocery shopping and was requested to get stuff for lasagna tonight. That seemed like a good idea at the time. Three stores later I finally found ricotta cheese. It came down to having to go to Wal Mart. Everyone seemed to enjoy dinner though :D



I haven't had the chance to drive the past few days. Been hectic here with kids. lol



Apparently the kids have started to call me Aunt Cassie....



I'm scared. :(

Tonight was a night of good news.



I have felt like I haven't been able to contribute anything since moving up here because of my disability stuff taking a while. Tonight I talked to his parents and offered to do all the cooking from now on. They loved the idea and I enjoy cooking.



Then while I was finishing up dinner, Sean got a phone call.



He is going back to work on Monday morning. :D



Very very good news.

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Yarja
00:42 Aug 06 2010

that's great news, grats!

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Vampirewitch39
02:03 Aug 06 2010

:) Happy for you sis.

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sahahria
19:56 Aug 09 2010

:)

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So in the past 4 days I have gotten to experience all of Sean's nieces and nephews.



There are eight of them. o.o



When I was up here in May I got to meet half of them at separate times. On Friday, we went to the fair with four of them in tow. Today his sister from Texas got here with her four.



Tomorrow night will be the scary night. Seven or all eight of them will be here. I know for a fact all eight will be here this weekend. x_x



oi

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Vampirewitch39
22:52 Aug 03 2010

Welcome to the family..big time. lol

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